cancel my subscription to the resurrection

…send my credentials to the house of detention. I’ve got some friends inside.

I toyed briefly -- very briefly -- with the idea of matching appropriate panels from Civil War #7 to other lines from that song, but Doors references, like fresh ginger root, are best used sparingly. The song in question is “When the Music’s Over” from 1967’s Strange Days. It’s one of those long, rambling psychedelic death trips cited by the group’s rather fanatical fanbase as proof of the Lizard King’s divine genius, and for some reason it’s been stuck in my head since reading the final issue of Civil War last week.

I kind of wish it wasn’t, because I happen to really like the song, and it pains me to associate it with what turned out to be the most monumental damp squib in comic book history. All the hype, crossover issues, and delays, and the best ending they can come up with is “Captain America gets tackled by some first-responders, notices the property damage his crusade has caused, sheds some tears, surrenders, and winds up in prison?” My expectations for the event’s resolution were below ankle-height, yet it still managed to come up well short of that low bar.

Now that I think of it, the lines “stuck her with knives in the side of the dawn/and tied her with fences and dragged her down” makes me think of the current state of the poor Marvel Universe. That brushes a little too close to fan entitlement for my comfort, though. The most appropriate song to have stuck in my head would be an acapella rendition of “Oops, I Did It Again” performed by Joe Quesada, Brian Bendis, and Mark Millar. (I will settle for the Doors’ track, I think.)

While I haven’t been thrilled with what DC has been doing with their event titles, I have to concede that they’ve been able to respectably balance the requisite shakeups of their superhero universe’s status quo with making sure that folks who want to read an unencumbered Batman or Superman story can satisfy their desires. The “one year later” gimmick, where the immediate post-Infinite Crisis situation was explored in 52 while the main titles followed their own courses, turned out to be pretty clever in retrospect.

Civil War, on the other hand, has set up a fundamentally untenable status quo (as far as superhero genre conventions go) that exists solely to segue almost immediately into the next big over-hyped event from the “House of Ideas.” (You know, there used to be a time when that term was used sans irony.) Maybe I’m wrong, though, and I’m underestimating the hunger Marvel’s fanbase has for stories dealing with government-controlled teams of superhumans building job training centers in Gary, Indiana or teaching literacy in the Appalachians.

I have to confess that the idea of each state having its very own official superhero team is pretty nifty. Just imagine the dramatic potential of a story where Green Mountain, Ski Bum, Old Yankee Cheese, and Graying Hippie fight the menace of maple syrup rustlers outside Montpelier. (I kid, of course. Anyone with the slightest awareness of how modern superhero comics storytelling works knows that these unnamed ciphers exist to be utilized as cannon fodder later down the big event assembly line.)

This post is far more rantish than the topic deserves, but I was aiming for something more substantive than the “eh” plus eyerolling that was my initial reaction to the comic. As I’ve mentioned previously, I’ve been reading superhero nonsense long enough to have developed a fatalistic, mechanical view of how things shake out for the spandex and capes set. Every few years, it’s a new turn of the wheel, but it’s uncommon to see the wheel spun so obviously or to witness the people spinning it catching their fingers in the spokes.

The Posies – Surrender (from At Least, At Last, 2000) – An excellent fuzzed-around-the-edges cover of Cheap Trick’s anthem for the denim jacket, nickel bag, and custom van conversion generation.

The Cardigans – Iron Man (from First Band on the Moon, 1996) – I don’t usually take repost requests, but, hey, it fits today’s theme.

It's a shame Iron Man has become Marvel's go-to guy for dickish behavior, because I've known quite a few folks who weren't really into comics but loved the character. (It's something not limited to my circle either, apparently.) I suspect the appeal is rooted in the fusion of the self-made heroism of Batman with the powers and abilities of Superman, wrapped up in a shiny suit full of gadgets.

Finally, if you haven't seen it already, stop by Chris Sims's Invinicible Super-Blog and check out his "Civil War in 30 Seconds." You will be glad you did.