visual synergy: Private Hudson goes MTV

Because nobody else had the stones to do it, this week’s lazy music video post features the glory that is Bill Paxton.

“Why Bill Paxton?” you may ask, to which I must respond “Why not?” He’s a man whose acting career has featured such high points as getting killed by an Alien, a Terminator, and a Predator. His role in Near Dark inspired my younger self to attach spurs to my punk boots, thus leading to all sorts of escalator-related hi-jinx. He managed to channel the dignified demeanor of Norville Rogers while fending off hordes of chitinous nightmares (though none so nightmarish as his Big Love co-star Chloë Sevigny) on the surface of LV-426.

Any man willing to take second billing to a flying CGI cow is all right in my book. Plus, he had a small part in Streets of Fire, which automatically puts him beyond reproach as far as I’m concerned. (Don’t look at me that way.)



Paxton directed and appeared in this video for Barnes and Barnes’ classic novelty song “Fish Heads.” Barnes and Barnes was a collaborative project between Robert Hamier and former child star Billy Mumy, and their musical output is the most damning indictment yet of a childhood spent in the company of a slinky-armed robot and ne’er-do-well scientist with a penchant for alliterative insults.



Jumping ahead a couple years to the golden age of big budget, high concept music videos, here’s the video for Pat Benatar’s “Shadows of the Night,” featuring Paxton as a Nazi officer. According to the IMDB, Paxton learned to speak German in preparation for his role. How does one say “Game over, man!” auf Deutsch? (And, yes, that’s Judge Reinhold in there as part of Benatar’s crew. He'll pop again before this post is over. Trust me.)



Besides appearing in other people’s music videos, Paxton starred in couple of his own as the frontman for Martini Ranch, an oddball pop band reminiscent of Wall of Voodoo, Oingo Boingo, and Devo. The above video for 1986’s “How Can the Labouring Man Find Time for Self-Culture?” was directed by James Cameron, and features cameos by fellow Cameron regulars Michael Biehn and Jenette Goldstein, as well as appearances by Anthony Michael Hall and Judge Reinhold. (See, I told you.)

Historical (and celebrity) curiosity value aside, the song is a fun bit of 80’s pop, and features the Devolutionary talents of Mark Mothersbaugh. (Musically, it reminds me a lot of China Crisis’ “Working With Fire and Steel.”) It’s hardly a “classic” by any stretch of the imagination, but it’s still far better than the overreaching and frequently painful efforts of current-gen actors/actresses-turned-pop musicians.

Martini Ranch - How Can the Labouring Man Find Time for Self-Culture? (from a 1986 12” single)