Friday Night Frights: Wrap it up!

The thrills and chills continue as Mary Marvel brings a dynastic level of pain down upon the dessicated kisser of THE MAD MUMMY...

(from Marvel Family #79; January 1953)
Why is he a "mad" mummy? Because he once engaged in break room pillow-talk about buying planned to buy his very own Valley of the Kings someday, and Obama's "socialist" tax plan will prevent him from doing so. He didn't have his brains picked out through his nostril with a length of wire just so some liberal elitist could ruin his magnificent dream, you know.

The fact that he doesn't hold a valid pharaoh's license, never completed his mummy guild apprenticeship, and owes fifteen hundred deben in back taxes from his work as a greeter at Spooky World is irrelevant. I hear he's booked to appear sometime next week on Fox & Friends.

(So it is written, so it shall be done.)